I am not Ugly; you're just holding the mirror wrong.
I am not Blind; I just love to listen.
I am not Retarded; I just learn differently than you.
I am not ADHD; the world just fascinates me.
I am not Depressed; this is how I smile
I am not Fat; I'm just as big as my heart.
I am not Bisexual; I want to share my love with all.
I am not Cross-eyed; One eye sees beauty in this universe,
the other looks towards my future.
Before you think you may have the answer, on who I'm supposed to be,
No.
I am not Special; I'm just being me.
I grew tall when you kissed me, and shorter when you were gone. There's a loneliness, something, in knowing that you are an imagination for now, that you are out there and you exist but you are not mine. Yet, I should say. You aren't mine yet, and that makes me a little mad, a little worried, because I don't know who is holding onto you, who isn't, if you are loved, if you are hated.
And occasionally, I just want to make it so that I'll meet you sooner, I'll keep you longer, I'll make it better faster and you will learn what it is like to be loved.
To be loved? I do not know this meaning yet, either, and it's a dark thought. There is a cert
I rode past your store.
Hungry and Bored
I was debating on stopping-by
My God those lines...
I still pulled into your lot
Found a spot in line.
Chicken and soda.
Extra waffle fries.
Damn the thought of it
Brought a tear to my eye,
The taste is just so divine.
Then I checked my facebook
As I waited for food.
An article on the Huffington Post,
Informed me that this line consisted of mostly homophobes.
5 million dollars donated to Gay-hate groups.
So I went next door
To get some Taco Bell.
No hate tacos
Sounded just as good.
I suppose it's time to share the full story of my self harm.
My freshman year of high school began relatively normal. I had friends, I loved my classes, I was an honors student. Sometime in October I believe, dates are a little hazy. I was on Facebook. One innocent comment on a friend's status, another girl, who I had been friends with a few years before but we grew apart, had to comment. She started bitching at me that I was worthless, that I always smell like shit, (I live on a farm) and a whole bunch of other stuff that I won't repeat because it gives a whole new level to the word "nasty."
I printed the comments out. The next day, I w
What do you expect me to say
When you keep pushing me away?
RememberI can't read your mind,
And time cannot rewind.
Regret will only make it worse
Like a bad omen from a curse.
This will surely make you stronger;
Please just hold on longer.
I'll be here, right by your side;
You don't have to run and hide.
Just try to find the silver lining
The sun will keep on shining.
Never forget that this is true:
I am here for you.
I have told you.
I have told you my fears, my dreams, my secrets. I've told you that some of these secrets will never come out, and that is true. They'll never escape me voluntarily, because they were never created in a way that would let them escape that way. But I need you, and I need you to understand me as much as I struggle to understand you, I need you to look at me and tell me that I'm a puzzle piece as well, I need you to convince me. I need you to be honest, but I also need you to lie.
Because lies are what I swallow best.
I have told you that I had a past, and a present, and a future. But I've never told you exactly how scrambled